Survivor to Advocate: Turning Pain Into Purpose
How losing my mother to gun violence at age two led to a lifetime of advocacy. The journey from carrying pain silently to using it for purpose.
Advocacy is not a side project. It is an extension of leadership. When you have spent your career building teams, managing operations, and making decisions that affect people’s lives, the instinct to speak up on issues that matter does not stop at the office door. This category covers the work I do outside the boardroom: gun violence prevention, civic engagement, reproductive rights, and the broader question of what it means to use your platform for something beyond profit.
My advocacy started with a personal story. My mother Joyce died by suicide with a gun when I was 20 months old. For 36 years I did not talk about it. When I finally did, in TIME Magazine, at the Democratic National Convention, and on CBS News, the response changed my understanding of what leadership can look like when you stop separating the personal from the professional.
I served as a DNC Representative for Wisconsin from 2017 to 2023, completed an Everytown for Gun Safety fellowship, and served as Board President of Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin’s C4 board from 2021 to 2024. I have testified before state legislatures, organized community events, and worked with national organizations on policy and messaging. I ran for Congress in Wisconsin’s 5th District in 2016 because I believed the skills I built running construction companies could translate to public service.
The posts in this category explore the intersection of business leadership and social impact. How do you balance professional responsibilities with advocacy work? What happens when your public stance on an issue creates tension with clients or colleagues? How do you build a platform that is authentic without turning personal pain into performance? These are the questions I wrestle with, and the articles here reflect that work in progress. Whether you are a leader considering your own advocacy path or someone trying to understand the connection between business acumen and civic engagement, this content is written from experience, not theory.
How losing my mother to gun violence at age two led to a lifetime of advocacy. The journey from carrying pain silently to using it for purpose.
Firearm suicide accounts for roughly 60% of gun deaths in America. Safe storage, honest conversation, and recognizing warning signs can save the people you love. Here is what families need to know.
We are having the wrong conversation about gun violence. The real solutions are practical, proven, and underfunded. Here is the conversation America refuses to have.
Gun suicides account for more than half of all gun deaths in America. I have been waiting seven months for an ADHD diagnosis in Wisconsin. In that same state, you can buy a gun the same day. Something is backwards.
I ran for Congress in Wisconsin in 2016 against a 38-year incumbent. I lost. But the campaign taught me five leadership lessons that changed how I run teams, make decisions, and show up.
Khary Penebaker lost his mother Joyce to firearm suicide when he was 20 months old. That loss shaped everything. Now a father of three and Everytown fellow, he fights to keep other families from learning the same grief.
Gun violence isn’t someone else’s problem. My mother died by gun suicide in a suburb. Here is what I tell people who think it doesn’t affect them.
I spent years performing confidence instead of practicing honesty. When I finally admitted I did not have all the answers, my team stepped up in ways I never expected.
On December 14, 2020, I walked into the Wisconsin State Capitol to cast my Electoral College vote for Joe Biden and Kamala Harris. It was my second time serving as a presidential elector. The first was in 2016 for Hillary Clinton.
Business leadership and community advocacy aren’t competing priorities. They’re complementary disciplines. Here’s how they make each other stronger.
Changing policy is not about being the loudest voice in the room. It starts with showing up, learning the process, and building relationships with the people who have the power to act. Here’s how one person can actually move the needle.
I did not plan to become a gun violence prevention advocate. But there is a straight line from losing my mother to the career I am building now.
Whether it is a keynote, a media interview, or a business conversation, I am always open to hearing what you have in mind.
© 2026 Khary Penebaker. All rights reserved.
For Event Planners
Topics, bio, past engagements, and booking details in one page. Drop your email and it is yours.
No spam. Just the one-sheet and occasional speaking updates.